Missing In Action – Or Is It Just AWOL

Something is going wrong. Im getting complacent. Im missing the gym, going over my syns allowance daily, not weighing my healthy extras and that is if I even remember them at all.

I was lucky this week. I lost a further 3lbs but I was ashamed as I know I did not deserve it. Maybe its that attitude that has caused all this in the first place.

I start each day with such good intentions. I usually have a B Choice for breakfast – mainly cereal bars. I had been making a packed lunch but that habit has gone out the window for reasons unknown. This would be a cheese and onion roll (I’ve been trying Green Days) with fruit, yoghurts and some low syn snacks. Then Id home cook dinner and finish off with my second A Choice hot chocolate and a chocolate bar.

Lately I’ve made no lunch so grabbed a handful of my low syn snacks – not so low syn when you have 4 or 5 of them! Then a snack from the supermarket. And extra syns for tea!

Im not writing down my food, not making and effort at the gym and not sticking to my syns! But why? Those weeks I lost 4lb I didn’t feel deprived, I felt stuffed and happy and energetic.

All I feel right now is fat, bloated and miserable.

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Week 5 + 6 = +1lb, -3lbs

So it seems it as been a while. Life has gotten in the way. Im sorry. I’ve stuck these two weeks together as nothing eventful has happened in either.

Week 5

I gained 1lb which is less than I deserved if I’m honest. I ate too much, I ‘forgot’ syns I’d eaten and I virtually gave up the gym!

Week 6

I magically lost 3lb this week and have no idea how. I did become more aware of syns but again, went over a lot! I am back at the gym though so maybe that has helped a bit.

Overall

I feel tired, my skin is awful and I am feeling rather slow in the digestive department!

I am so angry with myself that I have let myself get so lazy both with Slimming World and the gym.

I’ve had to cancel several gym classes due to work but didn’t pick others up to compensate.

Here’s to a new week!

Falling Off The Wagon

I gained 1lb last week which was fully deserved and I was ok with it, honest!

This week was meant to be straight back on! Sadly that has not been the case. I am not sure what is going on but I’ve been sneaking in extras. Oops.

First three weeks for example, if i weighed out 40g of cheese then the extra 5g went away. I’ve started eating it! I’ve been dipping in the fridge too. Again, mostly cheese.

Then there’s tonight. Another night shift. I do wonder if that’s the issue too. I was already on 11 syns before work (only meant to have 9!) so brought free things.

So far so good right?

Then I had milk in my coffee. Coffee mate too. Then some cheese sauce. And a bag of mini chocolate fingers!! The horror!!

Tomorrow will be a 5 syn day. Then Monday also. Finally I can weigh Tuesday morning and start afresh.

I really need to work out what’s going wrong at the moment. I know night shifts are hard so will save syns throughout the day on those days to have in the night. But that doesn’t solve the gradual picking.

Am I losing motivation? Why? Am I bored? Lazy? Whatever it is it needs to stop and I need to go back to those first weeks of excitement.

Back to my 4lb losses!