Note To Self

I am struggling so bad. And to be honest I don’t really know why. I have no excuses, no real reasons to not be able to stick to a plan. I could have hit my target for Christmas, yet as is I stand to still be 13st 7lb for my birthday in 3 weeks and no less for Christmas the week after!

I set my target at 12stone – 2lb a week and I’d have done it. But so far in 12 weeks I have lost a crappy 7lbs. While everyone else’s books are filling up with award stickers I have my lonely half stone sticker. I’m gutted.

All I had to do was stick to juices for 7 little days to give me a boost then back on to slimming world. Could I even do that? Nope. I’ve had takeout after takeout, snack upon snack and I’ve gained 2.5lbs in two weeks. I have kept up the gym and I think that’s the only reason my gains haven’t been considerably larger.

Today I have to take my juicer back as its faulty. That’s not helped but hardly a be all or end all. I just don’t know what to do now, keep trying to juice? Go back to Slimming World? Give up both and try something else?

I’m not convinced I have the willpower or motivation to go it alone but then again, the lowest I dropped to was done at home on my own. I feel like a fraud at group as I’m not following the plan, a fraud with my juices as I’m cheating there too. I just want to give up and magic myself skinny.

Juiced Day Two

Hmm, does anyone have any willpower they’d like to send my way?

7am – lemon water
8am – green juice 1
11am – green juice 2

2pm – meant to be banana smoothie but my juicer broke! Bastard thing! Luckily I’d already made the other four! Got so annoyed and hungry so finished off the bacon grill from yesterday at around 500cals!! Fuck.

5pm – other green juice 1
8pm – other green juice 2
9pm – shitty value ready meal, 350cals. Fuck some more!

Off to Argos in the morning to complain about crappy juicer. Dunno what to do about day 3 right now but we shall see!

Juiced Day One – Take Two

So after a shitty week of not really sticking to anything I decided to give it another go. Then failed. Again.

So Monday this week was not only weigh day (I gained 1/2) but also day one of juice week for the final time.

And how did it go?

Well, I had all my bottles and equipment prepared the night before ready. Then in the morning I made them all ready for the whole day. Can’t complain I have no juice to hand now, huh?

My Day

7am – lemon tea
8am – green juice
11am – green juice
2pm – yellow juice
5pm – yellow juice

Weigh in came at 5.30. I had gained 1/2 a pound. Text home to moan and complain about wanting to eat junk. Did I get support, saying to stick it out, it’s only 7 days? Nope, I was told over and over to buy real food on way home. Thanks!

So weigh in came and went, I got home.

I stopped to pick up pineapples for juice day two and got a twix too. Then when I got in, had two burgers in gravy with low fat cheese and three slices of bacon grill. Again, thanks family.

I didn’t have my final juice of the day. And I felt sick, and disgusting. I still do today but on with day two. Fuck them all, I will be slim if it kills me!

On to Juiced Day Two, again!